Lying diagonally on my bed; hot night and not yet dark outside, the days are super long in Belgium this time of the year, I neither sleep, nor think. Quite a rare state of mind induced by the hours of yoga practice. Tired, yes, not so much muscles, it goes deeper through the physical layer. Not even happy or satisfied, or yes, there is a deep contentment at the core of the being.
Yoga is a teacher. It is Wisdom. A Tool. The Light. I love the metaphor of yoga as a magic basket. Like in a fairy-tale, one can choose what one needs in the exact moment: a text, a respiration technique, a sequence of asanas… Yoga is an action, a conscious and constant choice.
Patience. Yoga transforms, but it is not an instant magic wand kind of transformer. And even better so. The unpredictable, the unknown is a part of the thrill, the excitement of journey. The ego is always involved, though, and I now I am capable to admit that I tried to bend yoga to my ego needs in the past. I used the breathing techniques to soothe my mind, so that I could avoid sitting with those difficult feelings. I spent some time on the cloud I created by means of the practice, unreachable to myself, and then landed quite harshly on my butt. I also remember the ego shouting when facing somebody else´s suffering: What´s wrong with you? Can´t you just do a bit of yoga and all will be fine?
Well, no. It is not that straightforward and easy. A spiritual warrior does not run away from the battlefield when scared but acknowledges fear and breathes some courage into it. A spiritual warrior uses the techniques for the higher good, not for an easy escape. And he/she cultivates compassion.
Life evolves. I finished the relationship I had thought was for a lifetime. I am offering my heart, strength, and vulnerability to love again. Fear sometimes slips in. The trust, the shraddha. I dare, embrace, and dare more… to stand on my head, to extend my love and to mirror a smile of another being… and I even smile shyly to the Unknown.
Beams of light that have found way to my heart during the Anusara workshop at The Tree of Life Yoga studio in Tervuren http://www.treeoflifeyoga.be
This is Jaye Martin moving his slender body with grace, breathing, smiling, and conveying the following:
Be the unique, the artistic expression of an asana. Here and now, true to yourself, respectful to your body. Melt your heart and soften your face, and let the soul shine through.
It is not about how far you go, it is about how you go far.
If you do not know what you are doing, you cannot do what you want. ?
Reveal your heart, so that my heart reveals to you.
Grateful. A few pieces of puzzle have slipped into the ever-evolving mosaic of life. Very concretely, for the first time – and it has been 11 years on the mat daily – I felt freedom in my shoulder blades. Well, patience, right? Thee trust for the chosen path, right?
The first heat wave of the summer found its peak last night, then clouds appeared, they created a hot curtain above the town. The temperature dropped and some rain might come… Or not yet.