The wood is green and dry, green but dry. Pinecones create a carpet that could nourish a forest fire with no problem. We are doomed or saved, depending on which fragment of me is writing this. Do I believe in afterlife? I believe in Life, binding force, energy, movement, connectedness.
A young woman has brought me a cold matcha saying We only have this long straw. it is a paper straw, sticking out impossibly from the goblet. The woman has a slight Ukrainian accent in her Slovak. I start laughing, we both laugh, the first laugh of this week.
A week ago, Veronika departed and did not go anywhere at the same time, so very Veronika. Many years ago a man who spent decades of his life in the USA told me he only liked the name Veronika pronounced in an American accent. If I told this to Vero, she would stay cool, beyond judgement, open and curious, light and present. There are not many with these qualities, so I do not really comprehend why they took her from this dimension so abruptly. Perhaps right because of that. Because of her lightness and the special skill to stay present.
The binding force of gravity leads me through the Carpathian forest, through the town streets and through sleeps and tasks and talks. Bats navigate the spaces between houses in the darkening warm night. Blackbirds and songbirds sing.
Can one love and hate humanity simultaneously? People capable of the best and the worst, and who knows which is which? The devil wants to harm and does good instead; goodness can cause the very opposite, both are Love. All matters and nothing does.
Can a subject called Paradox be taught at schools? Would it speed up evolution, us birthing from the pangs of survival into knowing we are consciousness getting to know Oneself in all the Diversity? When will rain come? Until now, it has always come. Even after longer and longer periods of draught that does not seem to bother people so much. Open a faucet and water still comes, right? Long or short shower depends on one’s consciousness and also on their wallet. Gardens are kept green with sprinkles. Who will sprinkle the woods? This planet has seen it all already in those billions of years, apparently, or so the documentaries on the Earth show. Floods, deserts, fires, ice.
We can be washed or burnt and God won’t even wink. Is it why we need the illusion called Problem? Something to solve, something to concentrate on, seemingly in control of. At this point, God does wink. Sophisticated, aren’ t we? Elaborated fashion, finetuned food, complex legal web, smart devices, all that to forget our helplessness, pettiness and mortality. Distraction created for the very same reason. Clumsy attempts to mask the survival instinct. Yeah, I know, it is useful, it has led us here. Despite everything, we are believers. Why are we here? What does the question stir in your system?
Know Thyself. Learn patience with Thyself. Passion is born in a complete acceptance. Like in the arms of a lover, let down the guards and embrace everything. Ego thrives on separation, rightness, knowingness. Surrender is never passive, on the contrary, it opens doors to inner power.
I do not want the world without rain or without Veronika, so, I am searching both of them – Within.
